June 22, 2011

Baseball Blurbs: 6-22


Last night's blurbs. And...here...we...go.

Colorado 4 Cleveland 3

Things going Clevelandish in Cleveland


They were up 7 in the Central on May 23rd. But ever since? They're 9-18. They've scored fewer than two runs 14 times. Grady Sizemore can't hit the broad side of a barn (.188 since May 27). Fausto Carmona is lobbing meatballs and getting shelled. At least another number one NBA draft pick is on the way soon...I guess...

Oakland 7 NY Mets 3

Banana Uni Streak


The A's had won their last five at home going into last night. They'd worn their gold jerseys in all five. So when they hit the road to New York, they brought 'em along...then wore 'em. That, combined with the Mets being terrible, gave Oakland its sixth straight.

Texas 5 Houston 4

Houston: We have many Problems Volume 2


Houston actually played ok...and lost. But hey...at least they got to they got to witness all 35,533 fans put on sunglasses to set the Guinness World Record for most sunglasses worn in the dark. Effing Texans.

Arizona 7 Kansas City 2

We have a Willy Mo Pena sighting


Well apparently Willy Mo isn't dead. After almost three years, the world's greatest name was back in the majors, going laser show with a blast to right-center in the fifth. He had been hulk-smashing down in Reno, hitting .363, and slugging .726 with an International League leading 21 bombs.

Milwaukee 5 Tampa Bay 1

Maybe Greinke should've stayed in the AL


Fact: The National League is terrible compared with the AL. So usually when pitchers go from American to National, they start pitching with sub-zero ERAs. Except former KC Royal now Brewcrew Greinke...who's got a whopping 5.23 against NL teams this year. In his first start against an AL team since jumping leagues, he went nuts, striking out 10, walking none and allowing just one earned. Not bad bro.

Philadelphia 10 St. Louis 2

Phillies go Bosox in 8th


Nine runs. Four Walks. One inning. Sounds an awful lot like the Red Sox rally against the Padres last night. Except in this game, the Phillies scored their 9 runs without one extra base hit, courtesy of 11 singles and 9 Cardinal bases on balls.

Minnesota 9 San Francisco 2

Great Fantasy Night from Madison Bumgarner


Bumgarner was about as cool as his last name last night. He gave up 8 straight hits to open up the game...allowing 8 runs in .1 innings. That gave him a respectable 216.00 ERA on the night. Solid bro, that's how you make it to the top.

LA Dodgers 6 Detroit 1

Max Scherzer continues to suck


Scherzer's may be tied for the league lead in wins with 9. But he's had a 7.79 ERA over his past six starts, including last night's 6 inning, 6 hit, 9 run quality start. Yet he still has nine wins. This is the motor city...and apparently this is what they do.

Washington 6 Seattle 5

The Art of Choking: Part 1


Up 5-1 heading into the ninth, the Mariners found a way to lose. Five ninth-inning Nat runs. Come on Seattle.

Pittsburgh 9 Baltimore 3

When a Starter has 9 losses...might be time to find a new one


Jeremy Guthrie is now tied for the league lead in losses with nine. Time to take the old horse to the glue factory. Or at least out of the rotation.

San Diego 5 Boston 4

Red Sox lose...WHAT?


The Red Sox lost? PATHETIC. That makes it 3 losses in 17 games. I am so sick of this team. I'm done. They blew the undefeated season already, but now they're just adding insult to injury. PANIC BUTTON.

Oh yeah, David Ortiz had a stolen base. No biggie.

Florida 12 LA Angels 2

Lost old man wanders onto field, manages, gives Marlins win


Crazy story. An old man who'd forgotten to take his pills wandered out of his retirement community and into the Florida dugout. He then managed the team somehow, and helped them break out of an 11 game slide. What a story.

Oh wait...that was Jack McKeon. My B.


Atlanta 5 Toronto 2

Brian McCann Mashing


With Joe Mauer's injury de-railing him a bit, and Brian McCann beating the hell out of the ball, you could argue that the Braves' catcher is the best in the majors...at least right now. If there was a triple crown for catchers, he'd already have it locked up, leading all catchers with a .301 average, 12 HR, and 41 RBI. hitting .327 with 10 long balls and 22 RBIs since May 17 might have helped...just a bit.

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